VittlesVamp

The Gelatin Conversation

Some discussions can only be had with a good friend. Preferably, a good friend from the Deep South.

Such was the conversation I had with my Arkansas born-and-bred pal Elisabeth, who graciously offered expert insights into the culinary delights of gelatin molds -- both savory and sweet. I wasn't going for Bill Cosby's Jell-o advice, but bona fide Dixieland wiggly, jiggly aspic intelligence.

The reason: A request for a Tomato Aspic at an upcoming Cajun-theme soiree.

The whole notion of it sounded daunting and nauseating at once.

Elisabeth concurred that the usual jellied specimen was a ketchup flavored mess. But, after a half-hour of discussing the merits and pitfalls of a series of Ambrosia and Cranberry gelatin ring mold recipes, among others, I now feel confident about forging ahead with a spicy Vamp-ified version of the classic Tomato Aspic.

I'll let you know how it turns out in a few weeks when I throw my Bayou bash. And, if it's as tasty as I hope, I may even share the recipe, wiggles, jiggles and all.

Shell-Shocked By Latest Recall Scare

This is getting really unnerving. The peanut butter recall was bad enough. Now, it's getting really nutty -- literally. Pistachios are officially on the FDA's hit list.

I'm just waiting for them to start recalling air.

Kosher Commotion

Hell hath no fury like a Hassidic foodie scorned. At least that's the message I'm getting from an article in today's New York Post:

It was kosher chaos.

A riot erupted at a Brooklyn restaurant last week when Orthodox Jewish patrons discovered the "kosher" hot dogs on the menu were chicken franks that didn't answer to a higher authority.

What ensued was as unholy as the hot dogs. The eatery's frightened manager was punched in the face and fended off the angry mob with an electric carving knife until cops finally broke up the frankfurter fracas.

To read more about this unholy "dog" fight, here's a link.

(Get it? A link?)

Another Day, Another Samonella Scare

First it was tomatoes. Then it was jalapeno peppers. Today it's peanut butter.

Is it me, or is all of this food scare stuff getting a bit nutty?

Cocoa Alert

Nothing says "Yuletide Greetings" like a hot chocolate recall.

Let's just hope the marshmallows are untainted.

This Little Piggy Went To Slow Food...

...and was expertly hacked to pieces in the process. It was all in the name of education. Dozens of curious epicureans packed into a demonstration kitchen at the Institute of Culinary Education for Slow Food's "Nose to Tail Eating" pig butchering demo and tasting. This meat-apalooza event featured Master Butcher Rudi Weid breaking down half a carcass of an heirloom pig, while cooking up the other half for our dining pleasure.

From head to hock, Weid skillfully wielded knives, a cleaver and a horror film-worthy hacksaw, in ardent support of the lost art of butchery.

I was duly impressed. So was the gent seated to my right. Then again, this gent was used to cooking up whole pigs on regular basis. The proud owner of not one, not two, not three, but four serious smokers, he waxed on about his down-home Carolina Pulled Pork and Slow Smoked Baby Back Ribs. Needless to say, I was jealous.

Thankfully, there was beer to distract me. Rogue Ales offered up samples of four of their finest brews, followed by a glossy, dark square of Vosges Haut Chocolat's Mo's Bacon Bar.

It was almost as off-putting as the Bacon-infused Bourbon Manhattan I tried recently, but not quite.

But I was in luck. No sooner had I washed down the bacon-flecked chocolate with some Dry-Hopped Saint Rogue Red Ale, when the swine arrived from the kitchen -- Boston Butt, Picnic Shoulder, Belly, Loin, Fresh Ham, Crackling and the glorious Head (pictured above) -- half a pig's worth in all.

It was demolished with glee.

Pork can have that effect on people.

Next time, I think we'll need Rudi and company to cook up the whole piggy. And, someone best offer up a smoker to take it all up a notch.

Dark Chocolate, Brighter Days

Isn't it wonderful when you discover that something that tastes good just happens to be good for you too? First there was red wine, now there is dark chocolate:

A daily treat of dark chocolate could help to reduce blood pressure, a study suggests. Patients who snacked on one 100gram bar a day saw their raised levels drop significantly after only two weeks.

Scientists believe it is fresh evidence that compounds in dark chocolate can work wonders for your health.

I'm just praying that scientists will soon discover that cheese and bacon are heart-healthy miracles too!

The Big Bialy Brouhaha

This has gone too far.

When a spike in flour prices can seriously impact Saturday morning breakfast at my local diner, there is a problem.

When the long-standing "substitution cost" for subbing out toast for a bialy aside my eggs skyrockets from 75 cents to $1.60, there is undeniably something very, very wrong.

I think it's time the government got involved. If the Fed can go and cut interest rates, they can do something about this new bialy pricing blow-up!

And, for the record, I understand that the bagels have seen a similar price increase.

Harumph!

Bun In the Oven? Just Add A Little Chocolate

Looks like pregnant women have gotten the go-ahead to indulge in one of life's greatest pleasures -- chocolate. The Philadelphia Inquirer, among other media outlets, reports on this new mandate to down more Cocoa Puffs, Hershey's and Cadbury's if you're "carrying":

More good news for pregnant woman: chocolate consumption may help reduce the risk of preeclampsia, a serious complication during pregnancy that's resolved only by delivering the child immediately.

It's long been known that chocolate can contribute to a healthy heart and reduce hypertension because it contains a chemical called theobromine, a natural blood vessel dialator and muscle relaxer...A Yale research study published in the May issue of Epidemiology tracked chocolate consumption in more than 2,000 woman during their first and third trimesters...Woman who ate the most chocolate...had a lower risk of preeclampsia, the study found.

Permission to gorge on Godiva almost makes me want to get knocked-up -- almost.

The Terrible Tam Tam Troubles

This could be a Passover holiday that lives in infamy. It may be a Passover with Gefilte Fish, Matzoh Balls and Coconut Macaroons - but this year Tam Tams will not be seen on the seder table. The San Jose Mercury News reports on the Tam Tam crisis:

Imagine Easter without Cadbury eggs or Marshmallow Peeps. Thanksgiving without pumpkin pie. Valentine's Day without See's candies.

Passover without Tam Tams?...

..."This is huge, it's a dire emergency" said Susie Weitzman, who works at the Jewish Community Center in Los Gatos. "My kids love Tam Tams. They eat them with tuna and crunch them up in their soup."

The shortage stems from an engineering glitch with new baking machinery at the Manischewitz plant in Newark, N.J. And the problem reportedly can't be fixed before Passover, which begins at sundown on April 19.

For those who are kosher-challenged, Tam Tams are bite-size unleavened crackers. Eating unleavened products - things not made with yeast - is an essential rule of Passover. It's supposed to remind Jews that when the ancient Israelites escaped slavery in Egypt, they only had time to bake flat crackers to eat on the run.

This is the first time since 1940 that the popular crackers won't be available for Passover. The news was first reported by the New Jersey Jewish News.

Manischewitz representatives Thursday weren't available for immediate comment.

Oy!