That's it! What's the point of owning a calendar? Clearly, media and marketing types are oblivious when it comes jumpstarting the holiday season.
The Dallas Morning News and Chicago Tribune are already hawking their respective Christmas cookie recipe contests. And, lest the retailers don't get into the game early enough, Neiman-Marcus has already launched its famed Christmas Book, chocked full of Yuletide music-inspired goodies and over-the-top gift ideas - like a $10 million zeppelin that accommodates 12 passengers, a pilot and a flight attendant.
IT IS SEPTEMBER!!!! Most of us haven't even figured out our Halloween costume, let alone decided on which new stuffing recipe to make for Thanksgiving. What are you people trying to do here? Frankly, by stretching out the ho-ho holiday season for three full months, they're killing the Christmas spirit slowly with their song - killing it slowly with their song. The lyrics go like this: cha-ching.
Am I wrong?
Well, according to the dearly departed in Dyer, Indiana, I most certainly am:
When Ozella "Ozzie" McHargue was diagnosed with cancer, she said she wanted to celebrate Christmas one last time with her family before celebrating the rest with Jesus.
This week, she got the holly, jolly funeral the Dyer woman wanted.
The funeral home was decorated with holly, wreaths, mistletoe, poinsettias and a Christmas tree decorated with ornaments from friends and family. McHargue laid in a custom-made red and green casket at a funeral home in St. John, about 10 miles south of Gary.
McHargue first came up with the idea 17 months ago after being diagnosed with cancer. She said she didn't want depressing organ music at her funeral -- she wanted songs like "Silver Bells" and "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer."
I can see the "Six Feet Under" episode now...